I knocked at the door,"Mum, are you okay?"I asked as I sit beside her and wrap my arm around her shoulder, bringing her closer to me."I-I'm-I'm fine, honey, I was just missing your father. I feel so alone sometimes."She tells me between sobs and rests her head on my chest. My arm still around her, I pat her head gently."Hey, young lady, you've got me, you've got Maddy. The two of us are always there for you. Don't cry."She winds her arms around me, holding me in a warm embrace."Oh, I know, you and your sister are with me, but, I just miss him so much." We all do, mum, but we have to learn to survive, to live, without him. Now come on, let's get you to bed,"I say as I lay her down on her bed, cover her with a thin sheet and put her to sleep. I give her a peck on her cheek and quietly leave her room, only to bump into my annoying sister, taking both of us down."Watch where you're going, dumbass."She shouts as she gets herself back up, feeling her rear."Ow, that hurt." I'm sorry, boo, I. The only sounds I can hear are my slow breaths. He has not joined me yet. This evening, after time spent snuggling on the couch I was given one instruction. “Go to the room, put on what I have laid out for you, and wait in position for me. You have 5 minutes. “I promptly raced to the room searching my dressing table for what I was to wear. Upon seeing only the blindfold, I removed all of my clothes. I walked to the side of the bed and assumed my position. Knees shoulder width apart, sitting on my heels, hands clasped behind my back, head down. I placed the blindfold and waited. I was focusing on my breathing; I knew it had been more than 5 minutes. Yet, I didn’t peak, made no move to search. He may not have entered the room, but I knew He was watching. I could sense His presence in the room, like lightning in a summer sky. So I stayed, still as a statue. He would be pleased in my ability to follow His direction. Breathe. I felt the gentle movement of air when the door closed behind.
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